So recently lots of awesome stuff has been going on. Firstly, I finished high school. I mean, I haven't had official graduation yet, nor do I even have my marks back from exams (that's Wednesday) but I am done. It's kind of...really, really weird, but also really freeing. Pretty much everyone I know is in a state of euphoria right now, which is also kind of nice to behold.

Secondly, tonight I went to a dinner party with an awful lot of people, and I didn't feel like I was: fat, awkward, boring, annoying, etc. In fact, I felt alright. I know this doesn't seem like a huge deal, but seriously, I do not remember the last time I was out with a group of people - even people I know and love - and didn't want to just disappear. I just cannot handle groups at all, even groups of a few people who I know really well; it's like as soon as the number of people exceeds five, I'm totally lost. Even worse when there's alcohol and I have to explain why, even though I'm 18, I'm not drinking anything, or planning to go out to the bars/clubs later.

Anyway, it's sort of hard to articulate, but today was just sort of awesome for that reason. (It's also the first time in a very, very long time that I haven't felt guilty about what I ate. So - a further victory.)

How is everyone? I've been absent, I know, but I have still been reading my flist religiously, and hopefully I can get into the swing of commenting at least in the next little while, before I disappear back to Canada and have no internet access for a very long time. Speaking of Christmas, point me in the direction of your addresses? I need to start keeping track of all those posts.

From bloodbelieve

THE RULES: Once you have been tagged, you are supposed to wipe out my answers and supply your own. After, choose at least 10 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If you were tagged, it's because I want to know more about you.

Let others know a little more about yourself! Re-post this as your name followed by "ology."

( Novology (totally works!) )

Okay, so I officially need this city to stop being a total and utter bitch about the weather and just get warm already. We are all so, so ready for summer, and I'm sick of the crap where it gets warm for two days, and then we have one cold week of torrential rain.

I live in Australia, you guys, we don't really do the whole rain thing very often.

So while I grant you that the rain is good for crops and the like, it makes it difficult for me to go for runs, it just generally drives me crazy, and IT POSES A SERIOUS THREAT TO MY BIRTHDAY PICNIC ON SUNDAY.

*sigh* Sorry. I am just a little frustrated.

In other news, I only have two pieces left of assessment until my final exams week of high school, which is both a relief and a terrible, horrifying thought. The two things I have left to do are both orals: one for Ancient History on an artefact, a really cool mosaic with the first depiction of Christ in mosaic form from anywhere in the world. The other is for film, analyzing gender in a particular film. I will be doing The Decline of the American Empire if I can find it at a single video store here.

Anyway, sorry. Fairly pointless rambling. How are you all?

So, in an effort to get back into the swing of posting on a relatively regular basis, I've decided to confess a new obsession of mine. For the past six months or so, any time someone mentions the television show Skins, the entire class - with me as the sole exception - has been able to engage in a very lively discussion. It involved a lot of shrieking and cooing and general carrying on.

These past two weeks I've been on holidays, and instead of making any sort of effort to finish the mountain of homework I had, I instead decided it would be a good plan to trying watching this amazing TV show.

YOU GUYS, IT'S AMAZING!

Seriously, from the first episode I was totally, unbelievably gone. I'm pretty sure that you guys, being part of various fandoms, understand that feeling where you first get into something and you already know you're a lost cause (and that you'll be on the internet just three episodes in looking for some good fic).

So just - if you haven't seen it, do. If you have, please come discuss it with me! Because the only thing better than having a new obsession is having someone to flail about it with. (I haven't seen the third season yet, but I've finished the first two. In just a week and a half!)

Alright, so after whining that there was nothing to post about...a small controversy comes along!

There's a bit of drama going on at the moment because there's a show that's just come back on the air here - Hey Hey It's Saturday - as a reunion special thing, and last night they did a skit called Red Faces. It had five guys in blackface doing a Jackson Five number, with another guy, face painted white, pretending to be Michael Jackson.

Now, Harry Connick Jr. was a judge for the episode, and he said - quite reasonably, I thought - that he wouldn't have done the show if he'd known that there would be people in blackface. His argument was that there's been a lot of work in the US to try and get rid of this stereotype of making black people look like "baffoons" (I believe that was his word), and that he was personally offended by the skit.

Here's the skit, and what he has to say. (He's on from about 5:00):



I'm listening to the radio right now, and the general consensus seems to be that he overreacted, or that blackface may be offensive in America, but not here.

What I'm wondering is, where do you guys weigh in on this one? I get that there are things done all in good fun, but I think blackface - like the golliwog dolls that are still popular here - is one of those things that definitely has racist undertones, even if it's not meant to be racist currently.

It's a bit like when that girl was talking about a shooting that happened in Melbourne, and called the people involved "wogs" and did the voices - in Canada, that's an offensive term; it wouldn't be used. Here it's used frequently.

And alright, for the Australians on my flist, I am not trying to accuse your entire country of being inherently racist. I'm just commenting on the differences between North America and here, and what you think about them. Is it just that Canadians and Americans are too politically correct, and too uptight about things? Do we just not know how to take a good joke? Or is it that, at least in some parts of Australia, there's a certain racist undertone that just isn't acceptable anywhere else?

Tagged by ashlein

1. Write your username.
2. Write your 2 favorite bands/groups of the moment.
3. Write something you love, aka lemme see your heart.
4. Write the name of your favorite person of all time.
5. Write the name of your recent favored person.
6. Tag 6 people to do this meme.

( It's messy! And probably difficult to read because I fail at scanning things... )

Sorry for the lack of posting these days. It just kind of feels like no one comments anymore, you know? And that's not meant to be wallowing in self-pity or a desperate attempt to get you to comment more - I'm just saying that people seem to be sort of drifting away from the internet lately.

Hope everyone is having a wonderful week!

So I've needed something to get me back into the swing of posting (I'm almost afraid to check how long it's been since my last entry) and what better way than a meme?

Reply to this post by yelling "Words!" and I will give you five words that remind me of you. Then post them in your LJ and explain what they mean to you.

mrsquizzical gave me:
travel
education
fandom
writing
family

( ramble, ramble, ramble )

On an entirely different note (well, not entirely) my mother has been taking me out for mini driving lessons, and, while I am getting more comfortable, she is actually getting worse. I promise you I am not a reckless driver at all; I still get a little nervous when I have to go faster than 60km. But sometimes she just spazzes out at me, which then makes me rush things, or panic, and that just makes things worse. Frustrating this process is, hmmm.

Also! It has finally started to get warm here, and I seriously just want to spend every single day by the pool. We're moving back to Canada mid-December, which means I get very little summer before I am thrust back into those awful negative temperatures. I think I will go outside and read later, once I've done all my pesky homework. (God, I am in a weird mood today, aren't I?)

How are all of you? Tell me something interesting about your week(end)!

Still
8000 words

I started writing this story maybe a year and a half ago, for tailoredshirt's birthday (it's in March, for the record). It then became a belated birthday present, then a Christmas present, then a birthday present for this year - but now it's finally done. K, I hope you like it. Apologies that it took this long.

Many people have taken a look at drafts of this, so many that I can't remember them all, but major thanks goes to saramir for helping me work through ideas, editing the final draft, and also just forcing me to get the damn thing done. (She also gets credit for the title.)

Summary: It’s one of those crisp days where everything feels sharper, clearer, and she knows the contrast of colours will look good. There’s a bench nestled a ways back from the road, and there’s something about the loneliness of that single bench that attracts her as well.

( prompt )

( Still )

The "You Should Write..." Meme!
my thread here

Please? I definitely need the inspiration and motivation.

I've seen this meme a few times in the past little while, and I had some time this morning, so...

( picture meme )

And how is everyone? How has your week been?

This is a love letter in its own way
Implied Panic GSF, 1500 words, PG, post-divorce
The last picture Jon slips into the album is one they took before officially going their separate ways. It’s a terrible photo in every regard: Brendon’s laughing so hard that his eyes are closed, Spencer’s turned away from the camera, Ryan is rolling his eyes and Jon is still sliding into his place on the couch, not quite fast enough to beat the timer.
A/N: Apparently the way I've decided to deal with Panic's split (divorce, break-up, whatever you want to call it) is by writing fic. Thanks for breaking the writer's block, boys. Title is a twist on Pete's lyrics, from "Bang the Doldrums."

( four love letters )

It's been a while since I've done a meme, and I do enjoy talking about myself from time to time.

# Comment saying Interview Me.
# I'll respond by asking you five questions so I can get to know you better.
# Update your journal with the answers to the questions.
# Include this explanation in the post and offer to ask other people questions.

From zeitheist:

( Five questions... )

So how is everyone? I have just started three weeks of holidays, which is wonderful. I also went to the gym for the first time yesterday, which was sort of terrifying - I hate any experience where I don't know exactly what to expect - but I ended up really enjoying myself. Hilarious as the instructor was (and the music, oh my goodness - I did not need a remix of Zombie, I really didn't) it was actually the best workout I've had in a long time.

I am going to try and use some of my ample holiday time to actually write something. I've been feeling very removed from fic and from writing in general for the past little while, and I want to get back into it.

Also - Big Bangs! You guys, seriously, rec me your favourites. I truly don't know where to start. I read mahoni's The Uncharted Sea in one sitting last night, and absolutely loved it. It's a really fascinating world to disappear into for a few hours. But it's not even a Big Bang, so I have a long list of fics that I've just been staring at, unsure of which one to read next.

My good friend tailoredshirt came to me last week with an idea (that she possibly stole from someone else - shh!) for a song-a-day community. The idea was to share and discover new music, one song at a time. Seeing as how I, you know, like music, I figured that it wasn't such a bad idea. And thusly - lifesoundslike!

By watching (and joining!) the comm, you'll have at least a few songs a day showing up on your flist, with a short recommendation and a link. There are only a few official posters, but we'll also have guest reccers, and you're welcome to sign up! We're hoping for a really diverse mix of music to come out of this, with the possibility of themed weeks and other snazzy things as we go along.

If any of this sounds good to you then please go join lifesoundslike. All posts are members-only, especially the ones with the download links. We're just getting started, and we're really excited!

Wow, it has been a long time since I posted. Which is just me being lazy more than anything else. Just a few random things, in dot points:

- Big Bang! If you have any favourites so far, I'd love recs. I'm not totally sure where to start. Though I can recommend lyo's fic, because it's amazing.

-Speaking of fic, I recently saw Star Trek - as in, the latest movie - and I am now addicted to Spock/Kirk. Pretend to be surprised for just a second.

-Another new obsession: American Idol slash. Okay, seriously - I do not watch American Idol. I never have. I had no idea who any of these people were until bloodbelieve asked me to beta a short Cook/Archuleta fic, and somehow that spiralled into me reading Adam/Kris fic, and...yeah, I have no good excuses for this one, guys.

-I am going away on an ice hockey tournament this weekend, so of course I've come down with an unbelievably nasty cold. Story of my life. (It's entirely possible that I stress so much about these things that I actually make myself sick, but I'm trying not to dwell on that.)

-On a happier note, I just made myself muffins! I actually made up the recipe as I went along, which is something I never do, and, while they're not the best muffins I've ever made, they don't totally suck. Colour me surprised.

How are you guys? Sorry I've been so distant - once again, no good excuses.

THE ANONYMOUS WRITING FEEDBACK MEME

Because feedback on writing is always a good idea, especially if it's honest.

Also, further apologies for my inability to respond to anything in a timely fashion. I haven't forgotten - I'm just behind on everything these days.

Hope everyone's weeks are going well.

One last thing - we heard musical performances by some of the girls at my school today, and one group did this amazingly beautiful rendition of "Hide and Seek," by Imogen Heap. So pretty. I love a capella.

Dreamwidth invite codes, anyone?

I have nearly finished my Ancient History oral! It's still too long, but what can you do, right? Um...how are you guys? How are your weekends going?

I actually have very little to say at the moment. I'm hanging out in my kitchen, trying to write (getting around to prompt responses, I swear!), listening to Sigur Rós, and enjoying my Sunday afternoon.

So I keep participating in memes in other people's journals, and then forgetting to do them here. Epic fail, I know.

#1 - The problem with Livejournal is that we all think we are so close, but really, we know nothing about each other. Hence, I want you to ask me something you think you should know about me. Something that should be obvious, but you have no idea about. Then post this in your LJ and find out what people don't know about you.

...because I am occasionally self-centered and like to talk about myself.

#2 - Okay, I actually appear to have lost the rules for this meme, because I am just that organized. This means I also don't know who I stole it from - if it was you, feel free to tell me I'm an idiot. But it had to do with the top 50 artists on Lastfm, & answering questions about them. ( Here it is. )

Also, I am still open to prompts. See this entry. (For those of you who already asked for something - I'm working on it, I swear!)

Oh, and one last thing - I'm friends with a woman on my hockey team, and she invited me along for a weekend family vacation in August. Which is really awesome of her, and I'm really happy to go. Thing is, they've just extended it so they're going to be on vacation for a week, which I can't do because a) I'd feel like I was imposing even more than I already am and b) I cannot miss a week of school. So I'll have to fly back from the Gold Coast on my own, which...shouldn't be as terrifying as it is? I can barely manage public transportation without having panic attacks, seriously - the flying thing is going to be a bit iffy. But I don't really want to let that fear prevent me from going, you know?

Wow, that was longer than intended. Apologies. How are we all, halfway through the week?

So currently I am sitting in the library and alternating taking notes from ancient texts for my Ancient History assignment with reading some Panic porn. This makes me feel vaguely guilty, like the library is a sacred place. Or maybe I'm just worried that I'm going to have some seriously messed up dreams tonight that artfully blends Cicero, Plutarch, and porn.

Oh god, my mind is a weird place.

Anyway! What to tell you. I did my English oral last Friday - it went well, I guess. My English teacher interrupted me - he does this all the time, and it still bothers me - to ask me to explain "to the class" (read: to him) what a blog was. This prompted several awkward questions from my classmates that made me desperately want to make my journal private for all of four hours, and then I got over it.

I will hopefully be getting back into the swing of LJ sometime soon-ish, and therefore will actually start being a good friend on commenting on things. I'm sorry I haven't been; I've been genuinely busy, with actual schoolwork. Not having a social life or anything, don't worry.

How about you guys? Anyone else really busy? Anyone working on writing (big bang, maybe?)? If so, how's it all going? Not that I want to send anyone into a panic, I've just been feeling the lack of fic lately. And a lack of writing. If you wanted to prompt me right now, for original fiction or for bandom drabbles, I would not be opposed to it. Give me a pairing & a prompt, or just a prompt, and I'll see what I can do.

Alright, so two posts in one day is a little excessive for my tastes, but I'm trying to keep up with this writing assignment of mine. Feel free to skip over if it's entirely uninteresting to you - I'll understand.

Step 1 - write character snippets. Um, I only did this for the girl who gets the eating disorder, writing about a few facets of her physical appearance in minute detail. (Type of jeans she wears, her hair, and her walk.) The main character, the person who's telling the story...I guess I want less of the focus to be on her, at least in appearance, because she's the eyes for the reader, wholly.

Step 2 - research. You've got to understand - I don't research. This isn't for any reason other than laziness, frankly. It's not that I think I always know enough to write about, it's just that, because I don't plan, I usually just sit down and write and hope it all works out. That means that, if there's ever anything I need specific details for, I tend to guess and/or glaze over them. I actually did research for this, and it helped because it gave me starting points for various snippets.

Step 3 - write. With no stopping, either. Just wrote without editing, so I have a really basic first draft. It's pretty much the length I want it to be - 800 words to be read aloud in five mintues? - but we'll see.

I'm posting this extremely rough, entirely unedited first draft here for posterity's sake, and also for your opinions, if you've got any. I'd really appreciate the feedback on this one. Especially if you have any personal experience in the area that you don't mind sharing with me, because, despite my research, this is a bit of a blind exercise for me. I'm still sort of feeling around things.

( the progression of an eating disorder... )

So remember how, a little while ago, I posted that comment fic (the ridiculous, fluffy, Brendon/Spencer one?)? This is yet another one - also ridiculous and fluffy, I mean - that I've just done a really basic edit on. If there are any mistakes, run-on sentences, bad punctuation, etc. you have my apologies. Consider this your warning, though. This is the mostly unpolished version. That's sort of lacking in a proper ending, but there you have it.

Untitled (Um...The Boys are Ridiculous and/or Ryan Wants a Contract)
Jon/Ryan, Spencer/Brendon
PG-13
( Ryan is totally a 15-year-old girl when it comes to Jon Walker )

Comment fic #3 should be coming soon!